5 Sentence-Folding Fixes
Posted: July 10, 2012
Fix your flat writing with these 5 easy fixes.
[caption id="attachment_10347" align="alignright" width="307"]
© 3Dmask - Fotolia.com[/caption]
Fix your flat writing with these 5 easy fixes.
[caption id="attachment_10347" align="alignright" width="307"]© 3Dmask - Fotolia.com[/caption]
Does your last piece of writing feel flat, static, repetitive? Is a soporific sentence rhythm dulling your edge? Combining sentences is an easy solution for making your prose flow more smoothly and briskly.
1. “The logging practices of the time were extraordinarily wasteful. They involved cutting and then burning in order to clear the logged area of limbs and other forest debris.”
The second sentence neatly folds into the first between the subject and the verb: “The logging practices of the time, which involved cutting and then burning in order to clear the logged area of limbs and other forest debris, were extraordinarily wasteful.”
2. “Smith completed his report in September 1950. It represented five years of work.”
The second, shorter sentence here is easily folded into the first, but how it should be done depends on the emphasis. If the duration of the project should be emphasized, then work the completion date into a parenthetical phrase: “Smith’s report, completed in September 1950, represented five years of work.” If the completion date is more important, parenthesize the project duration: “Smith’s report, representing five years of work, was completed in September 1950.” In either case, reserve the more important information for the end of the sentence.